Right now everything feels like sh't to be honest. We dont know what will happen to us, will be able to stay in Malta? In our beloved home? Will we find something in Europe? No one has any answers and there are too many speculations and rumors going around. Applying for pilot jobs in time consuming, you dont just send in your CV. All airlines have their own application forms  and they take forever to fill up. The kids have been frustrated to have their daddy at home without having time for them, they just want to play. At the same time, some airlines have this strange policy where they only allow you to apply with the once. Emirates in Dubai is one of them, they offer the best package but R is not sure if he wants to "waste" his chance to apply there. I on the other hand think its now or never. Eventhouh right now Im very happy here and would prefer to stay I can sometimes feel its a dead end. If we stay R will remain First Officer for the rest of his life, no doubt about that, since he will end up at the bottom of the seniority list again. Plus if AirMalta remains in the governements hands Im not sure it has a future. Even if they make it through this chrisis I have my doubt that they can run it properly to make it last. Of course the ideal thing would have been if we could have stayed here while looking for other jobs in Europe but that would have been too good to be true I guess.